waiting for godot 1 (samuel beckett)
Waiting for you in the dark
I hold a tissue to my mouth
to make sure I am bleeding
because only those who bleed can dream.
I apply a gentle pressure. Who have I
made myself beautiful for as if saying yes
to a question no one’s asked? The world
is a hole that grows warmer as it gorges
on bodies. In the darkness a phone vibrates in vain.
How many lives have I already stood here, hands
pocketed, eyes closed, as if someone inside me is humming?
You can ask me anything. Slower than oil
is the swaying of my hips. Slower still,
my coat, that thickest of oils, dripping off of me.
I have never been this naked before, that is what I think
as I lean back, tissue stuck to my lips. Never this wide.
Until my head appears between my knees
and we are looking at each other, finally,
as if to breathe into each other.
Blinding light. So much desire –
the screech of gulls.